Sinner’s Corner

Sinner’s Corner: The F-word

Sinner: Vanessa Friesen, Winnipeg, Manitoba

Confession: I’m pretty much a textbook good Mennonite girl. I attend church twice a week, I’m about to start a volunteer term with Mennonite Central Committee and I bike rather than drive in an effort to be a good steward of creation. My sin? I work at Earls restaurant.

It’s the sort of place where horny guys go to gawk at the hot servers. It’s part of the servers’ job to be attractive and flirty, and they wear more makeup than clothing. To clarify, I work as a cook, not a server. Still, I receive a share of the tips the servers encourage by wearing really short skirts – and, as in any kitchen, the language used is horrendous. I confess I use the F-word daily. I feel I’m profiting from the objectification of women, and participating in general unwholesomeness.

Moral Gymnastics: I like working at Earls because I like the people. There are a few exceptions, but most of my co-workers and supervisors are really nice people and have spectacular senses of humour. I’m sure Jesus would accept that excuse for having a good time working at Earls. And in case that doesn’t cut it, at least I only work there part-time.

Penance: Yours is an interesting case, Vanessa. That Jesus accepts your colourful excuse is at least two-thirds right. To be among sinners is to pattern your life after the One who also provided food for the sinful masses. And, despite the outcry of the religious or the feminists, that you dare to enjoy these heathens also smacks of the habits of our Lord.

However, this is also the guy who said that it’s not what goes into one’s mouth – like your tasty appetizers or entrees or desserts – that makes one unclean, but what comes out of it – like the F-bomb. For one month, drop one of your dollars back into the tip jar for your coworkers each time something generally unwholesome escapes your lips. (It might not be the worst idea to consider duct tape.)

Margot Starbuck, Confessions Editor

Send your confession to Margot at sins [at] geezmagazine [dot] org. Whether you regularly give motorists the finger when cycling, prefer Guns N’ Roses to the musicians at church, or get lured in by the smell of deep-fried indulgence whenever you’re near McDonald’s, absolution is at hand.

Issue 27

This article first appeared in Geez magazine Issue 27, Fall 2012, The stereotype issue.

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Issue 27, Fall 2012

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